Semi-Sadness as a Single Mom

These weeks and months have been challenging. I am in the middle of launching a business, starting homeschool, managing tight finances, selling a property, and still waiting on part of the divorce settlement. I feel exhausted.

So much is happening in my life, many good things, yet I don’t feel joy. I feel numb. The book I coauthored will be coming out soon, but I feel no excitement. Friends text me to celebrate, but I don’t have the energy to respond. I am involved in a program designed to help bring our plans to life with amazing events being planned, yet all I want to do is stay in bed.

Last night I spent two to three hours outside on my truck’s bed, looking up at the stars, wanting to feel better, but nothing happened. I feel a void, a longing that doesn’t get filled by things or people.

All my energy is going into raising my kids, keeping the house in order, and holding onto my sanity. There is very little left for me to create, to build, or to become.

Is this normal? I heard someone recently say that we don’t even know what normal is anymore. Is there a different normal for different women? Is a single mom’s normal the same as a wife’s? Does normal depend on how we live or how we feel? So many questions, yet the answer doesn’t really matter.

I titled this letter semi sadness because it is not clinical, it is just my way of naming what I feel. Sad. Tired. Angry.

Emotions I thought were gone have resurfaced, and I don’t know how to get over them. I argue with God, “I agreed to let go of these feelings, so why are they back?” I hear no response. I don’t even have the energy to sit still. My mind is a mixture of thoughts that empower me and thoughts that bring me down.

The pressure of paying bills, planning the week, making food or at least making sure my kids are eating, keeping up with trainings, and trying to maintain some kind of social life consumes me.

Deep down, I just want to give up. I want to stop caring. I want to be left alone. I want the chatter in my mind, the obligations, and the responsibilities to disappear. I want to give up on everything. Imposter syndrome has been my closest companion these past few weeks. It is very loyal and consistent in telling me the many ways that I am not capable of achieving my dreams.

I find myself in the middle of this hurricane of emotions and thoughts, but as a single mom, I don’t have the luxury of giving up. I don’t have the choice to stop everything and run away. As single moms, we must show up. We keep putting one foot in front of the other. Yes, there will be friends and family who motivate and encourage us, but they have their own lives to live. We must learn to keep going.

All these feelings are here to tell me something: that I am not okay, and that there is still more healing to be done. In a recent training, I learned that when something or someone triggers you, it can be a blessing in disguise. Whatever they stirred up is exactly what you must work through to reach the next level of who you are to become.

I am sure God’s plan is better than mine, and this is His way of showing me what I need to work on. I must learn to be still in the middle of the storm. I must learn to command my thoughts and align them with who He says I am. I must forgive, not for the other person but for me. I must learn to rely on the only person I can trust, which is myself. I must learn to enjoy the season I am in and see the beauty of chaos. It is, after all, how life was founded, from chaos.

And while I sometimes wish to stay in bed all day, that will not help me either. Yes, it is fine to give yourself permission sometimes to spend the day in bed, sometimes that is exactly what you need. But we cannot continue lying in bed forever. We must learn to pick up our cross and keep walking forward. Each step gets us closer to the promised land.

As I go through this season, unsure of how long it will last or what all I need to learn, I will do my part and keep asking God for healing. I will get up, take a shower, put on a nice dress, add a little makeup, listen to music, and let love lead the way.

I don’t know what normal looks like, but I do know that we are not alone. As single moms, we share a deep bond that only another single mom can understand. We must stand together and keep encouraging each other.

As Tony Robbins says, “Life didn’t happen to us, it happened for us.” Our path might be covered in fog, but I believe that when the fog lifts, we will see a beautiful paradise.

Keep your head high. You are doing amazing. You are doing enough. No matter how you feel today, tomorrow promises to be better.

Feel free to share what your heart feels like sharing, and let’s encourage each other.

Blessings.

Until soon,

Aracely Chavez

Founder of Seven Streams CashFlow

Seven Streams CashFlow is more than a platform for wealth-building tools and youth entrepreneurship skills. It is a faith-driven movement and a thriving community where like-minded families grow, give, and build legacy together.

Seven Streams CashFlow was born out of a personal mission to rebuild life, finances, and legacy after divorce, not just for myself but with my two boys by my side. What started as a way to teach my kids about faith, money, and business turned into a powerful movement that equips families everywhere to do the same. Together we created more than a platform. We created a vision for the next generation.

Check out SevenStreamsCashFlow.com to find out who we are.